Have you ever ditched your girlfriends for date-night with your man? Or did one of your girlfriends suddenly disappear from all social plans when she got a boyfriend? Finding a balance between quality time spent with your girlfriends and your man can be an exhausting challenge; especially when your relationship is getting serious and your girls are getting distant. Whether it's organizing your social life, rearranging your priorities, or just letting go of dead ends---finding a balance between girlfriends and boyfriends is crucial and you don't want to lose what cannot be replaced. And guys, if you flip the gender references, this advice works for you, too.
Become the 'Event Planner'Take charge of your social life. Plan ahead and set up specific days for time to hang out with the girls. Your boyfriend should understand the value of "girl time" and if he doesn't, he's not worth it. When you take charge with the planning, the girls will appreciate your extra effort. If your girlfriends are also in relationships, the Helium.com website suggests setting up a group date or dinner party to get everyone involved. Try to make weekly plans to spend time with your friends. Taking control of the social arrangements will not only express how much you value your friendships, but you'll also get first-pick on selecting the date. Bonus!
Any Time is Quality TimeDividing your time among the important people in your life can be difficult. This is why any time spent should be quality time. Even if it's only a short visit or a quick lunch; focus on the one you're with. When you're out with your friends, don't spend the whole night texting your boyfriend. The people who care about you deserve your respect and attention. When you're out on a date with your man, he should be your sole focus. AskMen.com emphasizes the importance of giving particular recognition to special occasions. Just as you would not bail on your annual getaway with the girls, don't blow-off your man on the romantic New Years Eve date he's been planning for weeks.
Communication is KeyIt's not easy to tell one of the girls she's spending too much time with her man. But if you are starting to feel that you and a friend are drifting apart, say so. Take her out for a coffee and be open about how you feel. Avoid placing blame. Instead, suggest something like "I really wish we could have more girl time," or "I know things have been busy, but our friendship is important to me." It should not take long for her to understand how you feel---if you have noticed a change, it's likely she has noticed too. Putting in a little extra effort to save a friendship will be worthwhile in the end. If being open and honest does not work, then it's time to move on.
Learn to Let GoSometimes a friendship does not turn out to be everything you once believed it was. People change and so do relationships. Unfortunately, some people struggle to balance their friends with their relationship and end up placing their sole focus on the latter. No one should be forced to choose between the two. Both your girlfriends and your man deserve to be appreciated, and recognizing the value of both will offer a very healthy and rewarding lifestyle. Remember, there's always going to be a time when you need your girlfriends and if you forget them, they might not be there when you suddenly realize you want them to be.
According to ArticleAlley.com, if you're the one losing your best friend to her boyfriend, you need to understand when it's time to bow down. If she's not giving your friendship the attention it deserves, it's time to let go. Over-exerting yourself to win back a friendship where the effort is one-sided will not help anyone. Let her live life without you for a while and if she doesn't appear to notice, she's not worth the battle.
Listen to Your Heart
You can't always please everyone. There are going to be sticky situations where you feel like you're being pulled in opposite directions and have to make a choice. Experience is the key to understanding the method of balance that best suits your lifestyle. Make a decision you will be comfortable with. If you let someone down one night, try to make up for it another night. Your loved ones should understand your faults, and in the end you're the only one who can fix your mistakes.
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